Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The Truth about Straight Men as Told by a Man, and What I Have to Say

I found this post in my friendster bulletin, and I couldn't resist adding my comments. What he has to say is in black, what I have to say in red font. Ready?
1. Ma-L. All men have sex in their minds. It's a universal truth. But to tell you frankly girls, it's not really our fault. God made us with high testosterone levels and our genes command us to act this way. If this isn't our natural tendency,then how would the human race procreate?It's a man's nature to be "ma-l" kaya wag niyo kaming sisisihin kung madalas kami humingi ng sex. Its our balls that command us, and not our brains.
Yeah right, perv! Blame genetics for your perpetual lust. Your balls command you? Come closer so I can reprogram it.
2. Liars. Dont ask me questions and I won't tell you lies. This is true, you know. Meron kasing mga bagay na hindi namin kayang I-share sa mga gf/asawa namin kaya nakakapagsinungaling kami, kasi pinipilit kaming sumagot sa mga bagay na ayaw naming sagutin. We try to hide things and if we cant hide it anymore,we lie. This tactic is perfected thru time kaya iyung ibang guys eh medyo natural na sa kanila ang mag-lie.Remember, we value our privacy and would rather lie than sacrifice losing it.
At least you finally admitted it. ".. pinipilit kaming sumagot sa mga bagay na ayaw naming sagutin.." Oh, GROW UP! There are things that you have to be accountable for and you need to explain yourself. Things your wife or gf might ask: Where were you last night? Why is there another woman's lipstick on your dick?
3. I'm the MAN! We must have this feeling that we are in control. Ayaw naming me kumander kami, iyung me nag-cocommand sa amin. We are open to suggestions, (though). And one more thing... if we say that we are not lost, We are not lost! Trust us. Don't you know that us guys eventually find our way. Girls really don't realize this but we hate it when our egos are bruised. RESPECT your man. Women take this thing for granted. Alam nyo, pagpaulit-ulit nagawa ito ng babae,naghahanap kami ng ibang babae. Why? 'Cause this is the easiest way for us to boost our egos again.
Wow, I never thought you guys were more insecure than a trannie who just lost her left boob. What's with the ego thing? Get over yourself! Perhaps people can trust you more if you prove you can do more than just slack around.. Don't get me wrong, there are intelligent men out there who know what they're doing. The majority? Those machos can barely write a grocery list.
4. Buddy. We stick with our friends. We must have time with our buddies you know? It's not everyday that only the gf/wife gets our time. We always have the need to do those "boys night out" stuff. The feeling is different when you are with your buddies and when you are with yourgf/wife. Babalik rin naman kami sa inyo e. Sigurado yan. Pag hindi kami bumalik...may mali kayo sa # 3.
Got it. Friends are important. You know what would even be better? If I'm your "buddy", especially if you look like Jon Mullally. ; )
5. Quiet. Sometimes, we are just plain quiet.This scenario happens all the time: GF/wife asks the bf/husband why he is quiet,the bf/husband says "nothing", then the gf/wife insists there's something wrong,when there is really not. Tapos, away na. Actually girls, we are not as chatty as you are, even with our buddies. Do you notice that we sometimes just nod at each other and still understand each other? We like being quiet sometimes.That's just it.
Ay oo nga, minsan para pala kayong mga Chimpanzee na nag-nod nod lang to each other. Girls, tama sila- if they are too chatty baka pareho kayong mahilig sa lalake ng BF mo. O diba Vungga!

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