“Soup dish” atbp.

I asked a rather nice sales lady, “Miss, hain an mga soap dish niyo?” (Miss, where can I find the soap dishes?)

“Didi, Sir.” (Right here, Sir) She says, as she leads me toward the Kitchenwares section. She stops upon racks of bowls (seeing the puzzled look plastered on my face), “An ano an iyo Sir, an durudako?” (Were you looking for the bigger ones, Sir?)

I had to smile. She thought I was looking for “soup dish”.

7up

I placed a 1.5 L bottle of 7up in the fridge (which still had half a liter content), intending on guzzling it down over lunch. I was shocked, hours later, to see the bottle full. Apparently our over-enthusiastic household help, thinking it was water, placed it under the sink and filled it up. #@%!!

Mag-iodized salt tayo

My uncle had a kumpadre over, and he asks the boy (a male helper) to prepare coffee. He takes the cups, fills them both with coffee powder and iodized salt (thinking probably that it was sugar), and adds water.

I peered through the door just in time to see both men, with indescribable facial expressions, spray their coffee after taking a sip.

On the bright side, they will reduce the chance of dementia in old age, thanks to that dose of Iodine! Diba the boy had good intentions?!

Professor X

“Sa Palarong Pambansa, rain or shine the events must go on.” He continues, “Lalaki ang gastos pag na-delay ng na delay ang mga games. Time is very essence.”

Ano daw?

Dubious don

I was worried I was supposed do my shoulders again the following day at the gym, so I ask the trainer. He says, “Ang wi-nork out natin ngayon ay abs (pointing to biceps), kaya pwede tayong mag-shoulders bukas.”

I surely won’t hire the guy as my Anatomy tutor.

Sinister cosmetic

For those of you who still are not acquainted, you can click this. Rhaulynmae, in her quest for beauty and the elusive Chinese-girl look, buys some Chin Chun Su. She naturally parades this in Gaisano (a local department store), making sure everyone notices her in her short-shorts, t-shirt, and headband outfit.

Aside from containing Zinc Oxide, apparently this cosmetic may cause severe reactions in some people, before (daw) turning you into a beauty. About a week after applying the sickeningly sweet-smelling cream, large meteoric zits appeared all over Rhaulyn’s face. It was so severe that Mike Enriquez would have looked flawless beside her. They only subsided after she stopped applying.

She swore off Chin Chun Su, and said hello to Ate Vi’s Eskinol (the one with those white crystals at the bottom of the bottle). “Isa pa Direk, please?” ; )