Chrysalis

You may have noticed recently that my blog had begun sounding like a self-help book. Well, this is me purging all my issues after dealing with them since I obviously can't afford a shrink. Rue unemployment, but in the mean time if you are the type who gags at someone's sentiments or problems you may want to click the other cheerful blogs on my right sidebar.

I'm counting the days, and in exactly three months I turn thirty. From this day on, when I'm not in review class or self-reviewing (hah!), or daydreaming that I am one of the topnochers for the December NLE (libre ang mangarap teh!), I imagine myself as some sort of larvae (aray ko) or chrysalis na lang para maganda. One day, when I've figured everything out, and God help me I won't stray again, I'll be ready to emerge anew, aka. ready to accept and live my thirties.

I suspect it isn't really a big change, because one of my stoic high school friends turned thirty and she didn't even blink. I've always been a bit of a (garrulous) drama queen, so you have to make allowances. But I suspect when I actually turn thirty (for the record shet shet sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!!) I'd be simply hitting a milestone, but it won't necessarily mean that just because I'm not a high level exec or a PhD I'd be forever banished to the lower echelon of society. I'd be ok.

So I have to use a little Minoxidil to keep my hair from jumping ship, so I have to work a little harder to keep in shape, and that I no longer have the stamina of the Energizer bunny, but honestly I actually like myself at this age. Formerly freakishly thin, emotionally slutty, and neurotic, the grown-up me is much more serene and well-rounded. I think.

Photo by Jane Simpson